Healing Relationships

You know few things in life are worse than messing up a great relationship. To some degree or another we are all guilty of it at some point. One of the most common reasons is our own baggage; the past hurts and doubts that we bring with us. healing relationships will usually start with healing yourself.

So if you want to start healing relationships in your life why not take a good long look at yourself? I don't mean that in a negative way, I'm not talking about beating yourself up over your past mistakes. Far from it.

I am talking about facing your past (and current) mistakes with love and forgiveness of yourself. Give yourself permission to mess up in the past, present and future.

If you can get past the notion that you have to be "perfect" for anyone to love you, you will give yourself permission to be you. All sides of you, good and not so good.

You will be amazed at how good that can feel, to just allow yourself to do your best without beating yourself up when you make a mistake.

Once you reach that point, or at least get closer to that point than you are now since actually getting to that point will take time, you can enter into all relationships as a better version of yourself.

That one thing will eliminate many of the struggles before they even start. If both you and your partner can do that... well life will be great!

Of course, just like with many things in life, the theory is great but the actual steps to get there may seem a little blurry. That is why a good counselor should be able to help you.

This can be taken out of the realm of theory and into practice but you will need some guidance and a few tools won't hurt either.

A good therapist can teach you better, more healthy ways of thinking of many of the things in your life, including yourself. With practice you can learn new and more effective ways of "talking" to yourself.

If you notice that you immediately start belittling yourself in your head (or out loud) whenever something goes wrong, that can be a wonderful place to start.

Just learn to start talking to yourself the way you talk to the people you love and you will be amazed at the difference that can make. When you start to feel better about yourself that new found confidence and love will come across in everything you say and do.

And that can only have a positive impact on those in your life. You make some positive changes within yourself and lots of other people, besides just you, will benefit too. What could be better?

So, how do you go about healing relationships? Well, the first step is to start healing you. Find a counselor or therapist who will work with you on that goal and who you feel comfortable with. With some love and patience you can be a better version of yourself.